Brady id expert7/30/2023 ![]() The license plates announce that you’re in America’s Dairyland. For them, it’s all about cheese, another thing their state leads in the production of. You know how confident those people are? They dominate in cranberries, but they make no boasts about it. If we’re looking at statewide reach, and we should be, we also ought to take a page from Wisconsin. That’s called a well-coordinated campaign, and I’ll risk the crap from my Cleveland in-laws, but I’ve always liked the Steelers because they looked so cool. ![]() In Pittsburgh, all of the sports teams are clad in black and gold. There might be residents there who cry and equivocate, but they’re probably hidden in the suburbs. ![]() They go to work even if they’re missing a foot, and their kids play football games in 40-below weather on asphalt in the dark. Think of that city, and the only word that comes up is “steel.” The sky is gray the people are hard, tough, and no-nonsense. One place to look for motivation is Pittsburgh. The real issue is honing in on our identity because right now, we don’t have one, and we’re too pissah not to. The above items need to be added, but we’re still not fully there. ![]() Not specifically a Boston thing, but still the best bread for French toast, and we should be the leaders on this one if only to make New York feel bad. (We could have two.)īread for French toast: Challah. What’s glaring are the categories that are missing, the ones that make us puff up and scream out, “Damn right I’m from Massachusetts!” So here are some suggested additions to the state symbol canon:Īpology: “You’re being way too sensitive.” Or go with Fenway Scrapper or the Tom Brady (he’s open for licensing deals and now has time on his hands). Call it a Boston doodle, which could then be referred to as a BoDo because if there’s anything we Bay Staters (official term) love, it’s a cool nickname. Sure, I guess we gotta, since it’s in the name, but in all my life, I’ve never met anyone who owned one. Boston cream might be the official doughnut, but really, our most wondrous circular creation is and can only be the rotary. There are other, shall we say, questionable choices. It would show a benefit to humankind, a recognition of science, and a nod to our state’s medical reputation. It rightfully deserves a title, which should be amended-a perfectly legal move-to declare that it’s the official remedy for an enlarged prostate. It’s tart and an acquired taste in that respect, pure Massachusetts. It’s like the grapefruit, only improved after dousing it with sugar or vodka.īut I’m not here to bury the cranberry. It’s not better fresh out of the bog, and it just can’t stand on its own. Mazel tov, Wisconsin.) My issue is that it’s also the official drink and one of the three official colors-blue and green are the others, for when your party talk needs a boost. We grow a quarter of the country’s supply. Our official berry? It’s the cran, which is not surprising. A corn muffin? I get that it’s pilgrim-y, but I can already say that it’s dry. Our list of symbols, as it currently stands, needs to improve. Do it in a disguise or at night-double it. Injure or dig one up without permission- it’s $50. They’re laws, which means they come with penalties for messing with them, or at least, they could have penalties. The only thing that comes to mind when seeing a wild turkey (our official game bird) is, “Get the hell off my driveway!” If we’re gonna have symbols, we gotta make them count, because they’re not ceremonial, key-to-the-city stuff. The problem is, we actually don’t-not with what’s on the books. We feel a part of something,” says Susan Westcott Alessandri, associate professor of advertising at Suffolk University. Yeah,” and feel less alone as a tear rolls down our cheek. Symbols are like handclaps or tambourines-not essential to the song but providing a needed texture and personality-and when we’re traveling out of state, we can think, “Baked navy beans. On the qualitative level, maybe there’s an upside. People can get through their day-to-day just fine without knowing what our folk song or gemstone is. I also wonder if having symbols even matters. (Yeah, never heard of that one either.)Īs you can see, there’s not one waffle cone or Donnie in the bunch. Cod, Boston cream pie, chickadee, American elm, mayflower, Paxton soil. And we have more Wahlbergs per square foot than anywhere else.īut are any of these official state symbols? Noooooooo. But deep down, I know that Massachusetts rules. I might rag on my state for the usual reasons, like the lousy winters, the traffic, and the drivers who create it.
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